i kind of miss the time of pandemic in 2020
when the halt in life seemed like a breath of relief
when there were parts of myself i have yet to lose
when the loss in my life felt so amplified all i could sense
was the absence i was surrounded with
from the size of my palms to the space
i occupied in the lives of those around me,
everything i am is small.
everything i've ever held in my hands
has always managed to slip out of it.
maybe that's why things larger than my fists
easily overwhelm me and i could never
amount to anything greater than myself.
i'm afraid i will never be able to hold it
and like how it always has been
every time i had the chance i will lose it
eventually.
