almost (5/10/2025)

There is a sense of relief in meeting people it once seemed you didn't have the access to, just as the sense of intangible sadness seeing the people you once had access to be lost to our own choices. Maybe there's an alternate reality out there where I had been unharmed by you, and instead I had made a life with the people that could have been. But today, all I have are these unreachable realities, thoughts and feelings I can't exactly explain to another. All I am is letting go of the possibilities, still trying to craft a life I can live in, safeguarding a past I can no longer change.  

Maybe this is the closest I will ever get to it.